#21 🐊The PM Interview and Impulse Control & Working Memory
Harnessing the superpower that comes from having impaired memory and impulse control.
I managed to sneak one meme in this week.
Part 11 of the Product Manager Interview and Executive Function (EF) Series. Scroll to the bottom to see the domains of EF I’ll be covering in no particular order.
🌋Takeaways
Working memory is the ability to hold and manipulate information in the mind for a short period of time.
Impulse control refers to the ability to resist urges or actions that are detrimental to your goal or task.
Acknowledge you think faster than people talk and you feel stronger impulses than others. Then use your use that energy as a superpower to connect with others deeper than anyone else.
Integrating tips, tools, and exercises to improve your working memory is more effective when you have a goal bigger than the task of the tool you’re using.
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⭐Introduction
One of my ADHD powers is I can remain calm under stress. I’m good in a crisis and I’m able to make decisions quickly without second-guessing myself. It’s why I’m drawn to Thai kickboxing and product management. They are disciplines that are a mix of strategy, practice, creativity, and crisis management. I love the feeling of freedom that comes from pushing myself to the limit. Leaving every ounce of physical and mental energy in the ring or new initiative proposal. I do wish sometimes that product decisions were made in the ring instead of threads of document comments. I used to see job interviews as battles to be won or lost. Now I try my best to see them as learning experiences. Regardless of the mindset you choose, a key part of interviewing is the ability to regulate your impulse control and working memory to successfully answer questions.
🤲🏾Domains often work together
I combined two domains this week in order to illustrate how EF domains work together. Writing about each domain singularly might give the impression that only one domain is working at a time to influence your experience and decisions. In reality, like the ending of Pixar’s Inside Out, it’s often a mix of different executive functions that create your responses.
💼Working memory and impulse control
Working memory and impulse control work together to switch attention, stay on task, and make quick decisions. During a job interview, they are responsible for most of your in-the-moment decisions.
Working memory (aka short-term memory) is the ability to hold and manipulate information in the mind for a short period of time. There are two types of working memory: auditory and visual-spatial memory1. Auditory examples include remembering the interviewer's name or the interview question asked. Visual-spatial examples include remembering the question you wrote down, the face of the person who asked the question, and recalling written notes.
Impulse control refers to the ability to resist urges or actions that are detrimental to your goal or task. People with ADHD feel a greater experience of sudden impulses and are less likely to able to resist them. Impulsive ADHD actions often lead to negative consequences that create and reinforce feelings of shame. Examples include interrupting the interviewer or answering the question before they have finished speaking. And my greatest nemesis, jumping to solutions too quickly.
Both domains fall into short-term memory control. Meaning much of what you experience in these areas is not remembered long-term. You might remember the experience of a frustrated interviewer but not the 10 times you interrupted them. Combined, working memory and impulse control are responsible for my split-second kicks and the 13 times I’ve checked my email and changed my music to get this paragraph done.
💀Ideal vs not ideal state in a job interview
Let’s say you are asked this behavioral question:
“Can you discuss a time when you had to make a difficult decision related to a product? How did you gather and analyze data to inform your decision, and how did you communicate the decision to stakeholders?” (Thanks Notion AI)
❤️Ideal state
Let’s assume you’ve practiced an answer for this question already and are emotionally regulated enough to answer at your best. The sequence of events of your response could look like this:
Your attention begins listening to the question.
You finish listening to the entire question with your full attention.
You take a deep breath. Your working memory processes the question into a summary version for you to internalize and commit to memory.
You write down the question on a piece of paper to reinforce your working memory of what needs to be answered.
You begin to recall possible answers from long-term memory.
You retrieve your memory of the answer and prioritize and plan how you’ll apply it to this interview.
You compare your answer to the interview question stored in your working memory and written notes to make sure your answer is appropriate.
You state your answer to the interviewer.
💔Not ideal
Let’s assume you have a practiced answer but your working memory and impulse control are on a rager.
Your attention begins listening to the question.
You give in to the impulse of beginning to answer the question internally and stop listening.
Your working memory doesn’t capture the second part of the question because you were no longer paying attention.
You are excited/fixated because you have an answer for this already prepared.
You recall the answer you had prepared without adding the context of the current interview.
You begin impulsively speaking your answer before the interviewer finishes speaking the second part of the question.
You didn’t notice though because you were too excited you hadn’t f’ed up your practice and had an answer ready.
You finish stating your answer. Relieved you said something coherent (maybe?).
The interviewer asks you to elaborate your answer further and answer the second part of the question you never heard.
You panic and try to remember what the second part of the question was. You sheepishly ask them to restate the question because you don’t remember what it was.
Panicked and feeling self-conscious, you ramble a long answer in hopes it answers all the parts of the question you don’t remember they asked.
🦄Strategies for working memory and impulse control
Acknowledge the energy that comes from being able to think faster than people talk and feel stronger impulses than others. Then use that energy as a superpower to connect with others.
Since your ADHD brain is Ferrari fast you can often find yourself bored or impatient with a conversation. It may lead you to a distraction or to stop listening. Don’t fight the urge. Instead, conduct the energy back to the other person as genuine curiosity, care, or kindness. Use your superpower to connect with them more deeply and understand their needs and questions. Be impulsive with compliments and acts of kindness to yourself and others.
Practice active listening.
ADHD can make listening hard but it’s a skill you can improve with practice. Fully immerse yourself in connecting with the other person. Focus on what they need as a person first and interview questions second. That means maintaining eye contact (if you can), minimizing interruptions, reading their body language, and slowing down. Create the space of belonging for them that you want for yourself.
Integrating tips, tools, and exercises to improve your working memory is more effective when you have a goal bigger than the task of the tool.
Approaching a new listening technique to be “less forgetful of what the other person said” is probably going to fail. Instead, create shame-free, novel goals that align with your values or needs. “I’m going practice new active listening techniques in order to learn two fun facts about everyone person I interview, regardless of how the interview goes”.
✨Conclusion
Your ADHD deficits in working memory and impulse control can you lead to do unfortunate and great things. The power that makes you interrupt people talking because your brain is moving so fast is the same one that might save someone in surgery. It’s the power that helps me write stories that connect with others while being shitty at grammar. Instead of trying to mask or bury my impulses, I try to own them to get me closer to my goals. It was an impulse that started my advocacy in ADHD and product management. It’s my crappy working memory and impulse that publishes issues with grammar issues. I get embarrassed when I find out later. Luckily, I’m fast to forget and Grammarly is getting better at catching me each day.
🐼Need help preparing for an interview?
⏭️Next Week
Timekeeping and why I can’t ever seem to spend less than 8 hours per newsletter.
https://www.understood.org/en/articles/5-ways-kids-use-working-memory-to-learn